She Can’t Be a Lesbian, Just Look at Her!

I’m very relieved today.  I now know what a lesbian doesn’t look like!

While you probably can’t look at a person and know if they’re a Democrat or a Republican of if they’re Team Edward or Team Jacob, thanks to Florida Lieutenant Governor Jennifer Carroll, I know two things:  that lesbians can’t be thin, good-looking women and that old stereotypes are alive and well in good ol’ Florida.  And, if you find them there, you can find them anywhere.

Pay attention now and look closely at that woman.  This is not what a lesbian looks like.  I don’t want anyone getting confused.

The Lt. Governor is embroiled in a lawsuit that claims she was caught in a compromising position with a former aide, a woman.  While attending the opening of a Mitt Romney headquarters this past weekend in Orange Park, here is Carroll had to say.

In case you don’t click on the link to see Carroll’s humorous remarks and laugh, she says:  “”The problem is that when you have these accusations that come out, it’s not just one person you’re attacking. It’s an entire family. My husband doesn’t want to hear that. He knows the type of woman I am. I mean, my kids know the type of woman I am. For twenty-nine years – I’m the one that’s married for twenty-nine years. The accuser is the one that’s been single for a long time.  So usually black women that look like me don’t engage in relationships like that.”

What???  Carroll says, “the accuser is the one that’s been single for a long time. So usually black women that look like me don’t engage in relationships like that.”

This is Carletha Cole, a former spokeswoman for Carroll, who is accusing the Lt. Governor of having the lesbian affair.

I’m trying to keep my gaydar focused to figure out if Cole looks like a lesbian.  Let’s see, she’s smiling, but not showing teeth, she’s wearing a drab-colored dress, no jewelry, and she’s not staring off into the wild, blue yonder.

Wait, let me look at another picture of Carroll, the Lt. Governor, to see if I have this “straight”.

Yep, she’s smiling, wearing bright-colored clothes, jewelry, and she’s staring off into the wild, blue yonder.  She is definitely straight or to quote her, “So usually black women that look like me don’t engage in relationships like that.”

Here we are in 2012 and people still grasp at the stereotypes that gays and lesbians look a certain way.

When you see pictures of gay pride parades across the country, the generally “straight-laced” media usually shows drag queens, leather daddies, flamboyant men, and women on motorcycles.  Seriously, does it think those are the scariest things that they can find to get Christian conservatives riled up?

Oh wait, I was so focused on trying to figure out what a lesbian looks like and didn’t look like to mention that Carroll, the Lt. Governor, is an outspoken Christian conservative.

Would Carroll think these ladies are “that way”?

Those are out lesbians!  Stop the press!  I guess you thought I’d show some mean looking woman who you’d be afraid to pass on the sidewalk.

Just to clarify things for Jennifer Carroll and those that still live in the dark ages, gay men and lesbians look just like everyone else.  We live our lives like just everyone else.

We have gay and bisexual men and women, just as the straight people do, that go out and bed whoever they want.  That’s fine if that’s what they want to do.  We have men and women in our community that go to work every day, pay taxes, and come home to their husband, wives, and children.  We even get phone calls from our husbands and wives at work to remind us to pick up something at the grocery at the store on the way home!

Jennifer Carroll, I don’t care if you had an extramarital affair with a former aide or not.  I don’t care if that person is a man or a woman.  That’s your life.

But, don’t be such a homophobic, closet case (if you’re lying and I’m not implying that you are) just because you’re pretty, thin, and that you don’t look that way.  Honey, in our circles, they’re called “lipstick lesbians”.   (Disclaimer:  I don’t use the word “honey” when I refer to people in the gay community.  I did it today because I’m sure Jennifer Carroll and her Christian conservatives think all gay people talk that way, girl!)



4 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by Dorothy DeMay on July 17, 2012 at 2:27 pm

    If half of the populous would only know the truth! Thanks Anthony, great blog today. I can bet your bottom dollar that if someone looked at some of my friends and “relatives” they would not be able to tell that they were gay, lesbian, bisexual and so forth. They would fail miserably at the “match game.”


  2. Doe,

    Thank you for the kind words. People just want to hold on to their stereotypes of what this kind of person looks like.

    Crazy! 🙂



  3. Posted by Dorothy Polito on July 28, 2013 at 9:32 am

    My Daughter is stunning – I mean really stunning!! Married to a beautiful woman. Both very professional. They are hit on continuously by men- Its gotten to be a inside joke with them! I think straight men are actually jealous of what these 2 beautiful women have together DREAM on!!!. Dorothy Polito


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